Let the Sunshine in!

via bonnierose

"An authentic life is the most personal form of worship.  Everyday life has become my prayer."

~Sarah Ban Breathnach

Vulnerability is _______.

From Brene's journal -

 

"Sometimes the toughest part of embracing vulnerability is recognizing vulnerability. There are so many secondary emotions that spring to the surface and grab our focus. I wrote this in my journal this morning as a little reminder to look deeper, be mindful, and practice self-compassion. I don't want to shut myself off from vulnerability because I don't want to miss out on what it brings to my life: love, creativity, joy, authenticity, courage, and hope (just to name a few)."

From my journal -

Vulnerability is_________.

1.  Not being able to control what happens, especially with my kids.
2.  Piecing together a resume after ten years as a stay at home mom.
3.  Living an authentic life.
4.  Knowing and setting my boundaries.
5.  Saying "no"/ also saying "yes"

Vulnerability feels like_________.

1.  Anxiety/panic
2.  Discouraging
3.  I'm under attack  - threatening
4.  Hiding
5.  Shopping, carbs, wine, chocolate....

Now your turn - what does vulnerability look like for you?  How does it show up in your life?

Note to Self.....

Today I got a letter in the mail.  Getting a personal, hand written letter is always exciting to me and todays was no different.  I looked at the handwriting which looked familiar  - but I couldn't quite place it.  The return address was marked simply with a heart.  From Oakland California?  Who do I know there?  Hmmm - maybe a secret admirer?  A long lost friend or classmate?  It was a mystery!

And then I realized - - this letter was from me!

I wrote it as part of an exercise for my online class on January 12th,  and had completely forgotten about it!  At the time I remember feeling a bit weird about it.  Words like cheesy, silly, woo-woo, sappy, narcissistic - yeah, those crossed my mind.  And honestly I won't blame you if you think that too.  But, I have to admit - this was a useful exercise.  The things I was prompted to write about are good reminders of how I want to live intentionally.  Here's just a portion of my letter:

These are some things I appreciate most about you:
1.  You care deeply about the people in your life and make time for your relationships.
2.  You are encouraging.
3.  You are learning resilience and how to be kind to yourself.

Here are some ways I wish you would be kinder to yourself:
1.  Believe in yourself - stop doubting your abilities.
2.  Know you are enough - right here, right now.
3.  Slow down more often.  Give yourself permission to quit once in awhile.

This winter I give you permission to:
1.  Go to bed EARLY!
2.  Take hot baths WITH candles.
3.  Buy only what you truly love.


While I'm still working on being kind to myself, I have to admit that progress is being made.  After all - sleeping more, buying less and taking bubble baths is pretty fun! 

Especially if you have dark chocolate to nibble on while taking your bath.....

Making Space...

 I'm finally beginning to understand that I'm a person who needs a certain amount of space.  The classic definition of an introvert, I'm generally not super energized after spending time with large groups of people. And I know that I need down time to myself in order to operate at my full capacity.  But even though I know this about myself I don't always do it.  In this busy, busy world it's hard to find space and quiet and there's always more on the to do list.  In fact often it feels selfish to say I need time to myself.  But I have to believe that by taking this time and making it a priority I'm actually doing the people that I love a favor - because I'm so much happier to be around as a result!
For my class this past week we were asked to schedule white space in our calenders - meaning unscheduled alone time.  It was not asked that we meditate or do something in particular with that time other than just take it for ourselves.  And here I have to admit that I have yet to schedule my white space.  Oops!  Guess I better get on that!

Thinking about my need for space got me remembering one of my favorite scenes from Sex and the City.  Yes - that show has some great, thought-provoking material in it!  Aiden and Carrie are living together and she's not used to sharing her apartment yet and is feeling smothered by him -- and well watch what happens....



I love that she tells him exactly what she needs!  Now - it's T.V. and they resolved things rather easily and quickly in my opinion - but you get the point. 

Brene says it so well  --

Sometimes the only way to cultivate more rest and play in our lives is to schedule nothingness with the same tenacity and commitment that we schedule our work and/or our family commitments.
Your assignment today is to sit down with your calendar and schedule non-negotiable white space over the next two weeks. We’d love to hear about your strategies for carving the time and maintaining the boundaries!
Self-care is self-love.

Amen sister!  And now -- where's my calender??