Busy, busy....

Hello blog.  I have nothing terribly exciting to share, I just thought I better post something!

Tomorrow I turn in my first big paper for school.  It's about 25 pages long, all about the ins and outs of my family, including a genogram and timeline.  Mostly I've really enjoyed the process of writing this paper.  What's been challenging is carving out the time to do it without sacrificing time spent with my family. 

I'm trying to give myself lots of grace during this season of adjusting to school and new routines.  But I won't lie and say it's been easy!  I miss my friends, I miss thrifting, I miss this space, I miss arranging and rearranging my house, I miss baking and jogging.  Well, only sometimes for the jogging.

Despite the things I miss I do know that I'm in the right place.  There has been so much good that has come out of it already.  Mr. Veen is taking on new responsibilities around the house including - grocery shopping!!  Seriously, I think I might have gone back to work and school a LONG time ago had I known Mr. Veen would do and enjoy grocery shopping!

And so it goes.  I'll try and visit  here more often - I promise.

Leap.

via RozArt

For my son Jakes birthday this year we took him and some friends to a place called Sky High.  Basically, it's a large warehouse with several stages made up of trampolines.  The trampolines are not only on the ground,  but also make up the walls.  As you might imagine this concept was extra fun to a group of eleven year old boys with nothing but energy to burn in the middle of winter!  

My favorite section of Sky High was made up of a foam pit ,which those brave enough to try, leaped into.  Some of the boys flipped in, others ran as fast as possible, and many first timers simply walked in. 

What is it about leaping that is so fun, exhilarating, and completely scary at the same time?  And why does it seem that in order for us to learn and grow big leaps of faith are required from time to time?  

I am standing at an edge getting ready to leap in.  I wish I could say I'm not completely terrified - but at this moment I am.  I'm hoping that like the kids leaping into the foam pit the particular type of jumps I'm attempting might become less scary and more fun with time.  But until then like the little girl in the painting above, I'll cling to my balloon of hope and leap!

Change

 via Darla Winn



Recently I was listening to one of my favorite speakers Rob Bell, address his church for the last time.  One of the things he said really caused me to lean in and listen - it struck a cord and has stuck with me.  He said:  "Any change, even if its good change is always a form of loss and loss must be grieved."  He later went on to say that "Grief is a sign of health."   Whoa. 


Grief a good thing?  Mourning fundamentally important and essential?  Great.

Because, here's the thing.  I don't like to grieve.  Honestly who does?  Who even really knows how to do it?  In our busy, crazy world who has time for it?  Most of us don't call in and say "I'm going to take some time to grieve today."  Or when asked by a friend or neighbor what we did over the weekend "Oh went to the movies, ate out, took a jog, and grieved."  Yeah, doesn't happen. 

If and when it does happen it seems something we are ashamed or embarrassed by.  It's really not fun or popular to admit we're in a funk.  People don't like hanging out with grievers.  We want to move on with it already, get through it, numb it if we have to.  Whatever it takes to get on to the fun stuff - the sunshine, rainbows and flowers.

Personally, I'm going through some big changes right now.  They are good things.  Exciting things.  Happy and positive things.  But Bells words ring true for me because I'm feeling the loss of change.  Because as exciting and positive as my changes are, they are just that CHANGES.  Pushing on into the new is forcing me to let go of the old and I liked some of the old. 

So today I grieve.  I mourn yesterday, even as I look ahead to tomorrow. 

"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom."

~Anais Nin

Brand New Day

I couldn't help but feel the truth of this brand new season creep in on me as I woke up to cooler temps. today.  For those curious I accepted a position with the school district part time.  I'll be working in a teen parent program providing care for the children of teen moms while they work on completing high school.  I am fortunate enough to get to work with the tiny babies - 10 weeks to 6 months and they are so precious! 

As I think about the obstacles these teens face I can't help but feel gratitude for the life I have, the simple truths I often take for granted.  I am struck by the courage, tenacity and resilience it takes to move through this world, and I hope to be a voice of encouragement to these young women.  I am reminded once again that each of us has the opportunity to choose how we approach our lives each day, each hour, each moment.

Today I choose life - the ordinary, mundane, joyful, messy, noisy, delicious, hard, easy, lovely, beautiful gift of today.



p.s.  thanks to my Aunt Susie for sharing this awesome video:)

Hi-Ho!

Today is my first day on the new job.  I'm excited, nervous and at times wondering what the heck was I thinking to think I could juggle this and do everything I've already been doing? 

The truth is, I won't be able to do it all.  I never did, and I still won't.  The truth is, this part time job is going to force me to delegate - to the kid's, to Mr. Veen, to friends.  I'm realizing I'm not good at delegating. 

The truth is, it's another step in letting go a bit....letting my birdies stretch their wings and in return I get to try mine out a little again. 

Wish us all luck!



Change is good!

With summer drawing to a close there are some significant changes in the forecast.  I love this little place to share my thoughts, photos and ideas but I anticipate that I won't have as much time to devote to it in the near future. 

That said  - I still hope to pop in a few times a week and share what's on my mind.  I'd love if you continue to join me from time to time.  I always appreciate your thoughts and comments!

Here's hoping that as a new season begins happy changes come your way....